Monthly Archives: November 2020

Training soft skills: How to improve your social skills

Soft skills are becoming more and more important for success at work. Learned specialist knowledge and methodological competence are only half the battle. Because if your attitude and relationship with yourself and others are not right, you will not advance your 1.0 degree and all of your knowledge alone. HR managers complain about a lack of soft skills among applicants and candidates underestimate the importance of the hiring process, as this study shows. With the increasing change in the world of work towards more project work, interdisciplinary, agile, or even virtual teams, and more individual responsibility, the importance of social skills will continue to increase. Soft skills can be trained. Not overnight in a weekend seminar, but through awareness, mindfulness and attention, observation, and self-reflection. The great thing about it: You can train it anytime, anywhere. In private life as well as at work. Regardless of whether you are a schoolchild, student, young professional, or old hand, you can work on your soft skills every day on the side, but in a targeted manner:

Training soft skills: 6 exercises for more social competence

Any form of exercise is effective if you focus. Therefore, I present a weekly plan with which you can train and develop a different social competence every day.

Perhaps you will have to leave your usual comfort zone for this workout. Dare to go out step by step as far as you want and believe that it is good for you. Training shouldn’t be torture! Be curious whether and what will change.

You will likely find yourself in a situation where you will fall back into old habits. If you really get into the exercise of the day, you will quickly recognize these situations. Try doing something different than usual to actively train new behavior. Perhaps those around you will shake heads and reap amazement. This is normal, as your behavior is unfamiliar to others.

Monday: Active listening

Today you are listening carefully to what others have to say. Concentrate on consciously taking in everything that he/she says when talking to the boss, colleague, or partner. During this time, press the pause button for your own movie in your head. Do you really care! (Only if you are really interested, of course.) Take note of as much information from your counterpart as possible. Pay attention not only to the content but also to language, posture, gestures, and facial expressions.

My tip: Imagine you have to repeat what the other person said at the beginning of your answer before making your statement. Just introduce yourself, otherwise, the conversation will be stiff and silly. When it is your turn, say what is important to you in response. Active listening is exhausting. But you will be surprised how much communication benefits from it because there are no misunderstandings and you simply “understand” each other better.

Tuesday: Appreciation

No, today you shouldn’t praise everything and everyone. That would not be authentic! Rather, be careful not only to look for problems and criticize mistakes but also successes and see what works well. Acknowledge it in yourself and speak it out to others. Appreciate your achievements and the achievements of others, even if they may not be anything special for you at first are. Your appreciation and praise should be meant to be authentic and genuine.

Find out for yourself today what appreciation and recognition mean for you in your various roles in your professional and private life. In which situations or with which people do you find it easy/difficult to be appreciative and why is that? On the other hand: Who would you like to have more appreciation from yourself and what can you contribute to this yourself? What changes in your relationship with yourself and with others on your Appreciation Tuesday?

Wednesday: empathy

Any behavior makes sense in any context. If a colleague or employee annoys you again, put yourself in his / her position and ask yourself: Why is it important to him/her to behave like this and not differently? What is going on in the head of the other? Don’t rush to judge or judge behavior because you would do something differently or think you know better. Try to understand the behavior of others in their context.

Many people mistake empathy for pity. But compassion and compassion make a difference. Put on your counterpart’s glasses and try to see the subject in the room through their perspective. Get to know the people around you with their values ​​and points of view: What is important to them and why? For the executives among you: How do your employees feel? How do the employees perceive themselves and how do you perceive them? What do your employees need from you to do a good job?

It’s not about analyzing and understanding every other behavior. Then you would be very busy and only read minds. No, rather it is about your own awareness that other people can have a different view of things and that there is not always a right or wrong. Extend your emotional antennae on Wednesdays and be particularly aware of interpersonal relationships.

Thursday: Teamwork

Today it’s about being strong and successful together. Teamwork will become more and more important in the future. Teamwork doesn’t stop with your employer, it also affects your private life. How well can you get involved with other people, pursue ideas together and work on solutions? Even if you don’t have a single appointment today, you are sure to come into contact with colleagues or other people in some form. Teamwork also means carrying the older neighbors’ purchases up the stairs or helping colleagues with difficult tasks.

Pay attention today to how you can use which of your strengths for the benefit of the community. Do not wait until someone asks you for advice; offer your support (not intrusively!). If you are working in a team today or if a meeting is pending, then pay attention to which role you play in the team and which might be different in the future. Also, keep your eyes and ears open to see how others perceive you as a team member. Are you accepted and welcome to the team? If so, what exactly is it that others appreciate about you? If not, what can you do to improve teamwork yourself?

Friday: personal responsibility

Before the weekend starts, become the boss today – of your own life! Take responsibility for your actions. Today you neither put the blame in the shoes of others nor avoid things or mutate into a fellow pig. Make an active decision on what is important to you at this moment. Throughout the day, pay attention to the situations in which you would most like to give up responsibility because you are used to it and it would be so easy. Ask yourself whether it is right not to take responsibility in this situation (if so, who is actually responsible?) Or whether you should actively take it instead?

On this day you will quickly notice how often you don’t feel responsible out of habit, even though you actually are. Typical are cases where you whine, are angry at others, or resent about something. Your exercise today: If you notice these feelings, do not be a victim of the bad circumstances, but clarify for yourself what the situation has to do with you and whether or how you can take responsibility instead – to your boss Life day.

Saturday: Weekly Review

Today you reflect on your experiences of the past week. What worked well and where did you feel comfortable? What did you find difficult and what do you think was the cause? What do you plan to do for the next week, continue training, or do differently?

Social competence includes two aspects: It is the behavior with and to yourself and also the behavior with and to others. Separate your weekly review according to this distinction:

What have you personally brought last week’s training? How have your own perception, behavior, motivation, self-discipline, self-esteem, and self-awareness changed? Is there anything that has changed and if so, was it helpful and good for you?

What has changed compared to? Your ability to criticize or deal with conflict, ability to work in a team, ability to compromise, tolerance, communication, appreciation of others. How did you experience your interaction with others and what reactions did you observe from others towards you?

Sunday: rest day

I guess you know what to do today.

You probably guessed it: a week of soft skills training is not enough. As for all competencies, the maxim of lifelong learning also applies here. If you are “in practice”, then forget your weekly plan and train what is important for you, your position, and your environment.

Anonymous application: How to protect your new employer from discrimination

The anonymous application will be discussed again these days. Success reports of good (random) hits in recruiting are increasing. Logical. Because if there is no longer any data such as date of birth or gender, then neither the machine algorithm nor the human brain can accidentally sort out technically excellent applicants. But what does that mean to apply anonymously? I’ll play it through below for the résumé and certificates – with a wink! Is it really the case that companies and applicants can find each other better when recruiters can no longer form a picture? The General Equal Treatment Act (AGG) created the legal obligation to ensure equal treatment 10 years ago. But unfortunately, there is still no safely functioning off button on us humans for prejudices and stereotyped thinking. Discrimination in the workplace remains an issue. The solution to oblige applicants to apply without a face or profile to prevent discrimination, I don’t think that’s a good idea.

Applicants, finally protect the company from discrimination!

The General Equal Treatment Act (AGG) celebrated its 10th anniversary in August 2016. The aim of the law was or is to “prevent or eliminate discrimination based on race or ethnic origin, gender, religion or belief, disability, age or sexual identity.” This applies to the selection – and employment conditions, working conditions, vocational training, social benefits, and everything that has anything to do with education.

So everything should be sorted out. Well, paragraphs 8-10 of the AGG allow plenty of exceptions when the inadmissibility of the disadvantage is permissible as long as there are valid reasons for this. This is the case, for example, with the upper age limit for pilots, as the labor courts ruled. I personally think that’s right.

Many applicants today feel the downside of the AGG in a completely different way. Because after a rejection they are interested in why it didn’t work out. They do not get any answers beyond “Does not fit!” – unless there is a conversation behind closed doors. Learning from mistakes in the application process and feedback from the other party is almost impossible today. Companies are too afraid of being sued for violating the AGG if the reasons are given.

Discrimination still exists in today’s world of work despite the law. This is borne out by current figures such as those from the Federal Anti-Discrimination Agency, and this is the result of a study by the University of Konstanz that showed disadvantages for applicants with Turkish names. It goes without saying that there should no longer be a place for discrimination in our society. Given the current number of refugees, we will not do ourselves any favors on the labor market. However, I doubt whether the emerging calls for even stricter legislation to prevent discrimination are the solution.

Back to the anonymous application. How does that fit in with the AGG? Isn’t it an obvious declaration of bankruptcy that the law is nothing more than a piece of paper and that decision-makers, as people in companies, cannot free themselves from stereotyped thinking and unjust judgment? Because processes may even only run subconsciously in their heads that, when looking at an applicant’s photo, decide whether they are sympathetic or antipathetic and thus whether they are invited or rejected. Because they are certain that a 50-year-old applicant is less flexible than a 25-year-old university graduate. Because they have an image in their head of an ideal candidate to fill the vacant position in the team and this is a middle-aged woman. Yes, that is pure inequality of opportunity and no HR manager or boss would admit that.

What would you do if you, as an employer, noticed that the attempt to enforce equal treatment by law was not working?

Is the anonymous application a clever move by companies to give up responsibility and escape the discrimination trap as an employer by obliging their applicants to only apply anonymously? Because if you literally can’t get a picture of a candidate, you can’t discriminate.

Why this is in my opinion way too short, more on that later. Before that, I would like to take the anonymous application experiment a little to the extreme:

This is what your perfect anonymous application looks like

What belongs in a perfect anonymous application not in? Just leaving out the photo would be too short-sighted, because your tracks on the internet are huge today. We all know that HR professionals today, incognito, scour social networks for applicants. And when they land on your Facebook profile and find you on malls in shorts and drinking beer, then anonymity is over – and the job!

Here are – with a wink – the five really crucial points for your application to be 100 percent anonymous:

No personal data

This includes your name, date of birth, place of birth, place of residence, marital status, and telephone number. In any case, you must ensure that the recipient of your application cannot find you using the address information or the reverse search of the telephone information. Anyone who finds out your name is lost and the door to discrimination is open again. Go through all the documents, certificates, and certificates that you have to attach as evidence of your professional qualification and blackout everything there that could indicate your name, gender, age, or origin.

Neutral, reputable email address

In the unlikely event that the company is interested in you as an applicant, a contact option is useful. Since you keep your address and telephone number anonymous, set up a neutral (!) E-mail address with a reputable e-mail provider. Ideally according to the example: [email protected].

Avatar as a placeholder for your personality

So that your anonymous résumé does not come across as unaccustomedly naked, use an avatar. Now, don’t fall into the trap, and be sure to use a gender-neutral image so the company can’t make any guesses as to whether you are a male or a female. To be on the safe side, be sure to swap the photos in all your social networks for this picture during the application phase.

Blacking out ex-employers

You know how small the world is sometimes. Two HR managers meet at a conference and it is easy to find out how you left your ex-employer. So: do not mention the company name on your résumé, but rather the industry. But be careful here too: If there aren’t too many companies there, you could give them away too. It is not rocket science for a hard-working HR officer to phone all the companies in question and ask who was employed there during the period mentioned. Even when describing the job title or position, you have to be careful not to give away the information about the name of the ex-employer – for example, if you were “Brand Manager Nutella”. Don’t mention years on your résumé, a good mathematician could calculate your age.

Blackout any reference documents that have logos addresses on the stationery, or signatures of your senior executives. Also blackout the description of your activities in the certificates, this can reveal you! What counts is just the assessment of your old employer anyway, so sentences like “ Mr. Slaghuis always speaks to customers, colleagues and superiors behave in an exemplary manner.”

Do not sign documents

Today hardly any applicant (unfortunately!) signs their cover letter and CV by hand with a scanned signature anyway. If you of all people have done it so far: Don’t do it! This is pure personality and the death knell for your anonymous application. The other side could immediately recognize your girl’s handwriting or assume a high dominance if your writing is strongly tilted to the right. You don’t even believe what can be read graphologically from signatures.

Why anonymous application does not protect against discrimination

If you have not yet recognized my undertone and the exaggeration in the tips for your guaranteed anonymous application, then I say here in all clarity: I do not believe in the anonymous application and I believe that the procedure is not suitable for the job market does well and is also highly inefficient for the recruiting process.

Even today, employers and applicants find it extremely difficult to find each other well. Because job postings are imprecise and full of platitudes and applicants answer them conscientiously so as not to be automatically sorted out because of missing keywords. Because applicants today send out masses of applications with one click using the watering can principle and hardly take any time to think about what and who really suits them.

Most of the cover letters I read from applicants are full of empty phrases and justifications for making mistakes on the CV about why they are the best candidate for the position. They list their specialist knowledge and work experience but remain intangible in terms of their personality and social skills. In the future, it will be more and more important for our new forms of cooperation. Even today, hardly any employer can get a clear picture of an applicant and make a good decision as to whether the effort involved in the invitation to the interview is worthwhile. The anonymous application leads even more to the fact that the profile of the applicant is blurred.

Rethinking in your head instead of disguising more

From my point of view, only the opposite direction can solve today’s problems – whether we call them a shortage of skilled workers or a war for talents. Applicants and recruiters come together well when both sides create as much clarity as possible about themselves as early as possible in the search process. So it’s better to have clear job profiles with high-quality requirements and applications with which those interested in a job actually show who they are, what makes them tick, what is important to them, and where they want to go.

The solution to the problem of discrimination as a result of conscious or unconscious unequal treatment of people, in my view, does not lie in withholding information to protect decision-makers, but rather in changing their personal attitude and their own consciousness.

When employers don’t just stick to the colorful flags, but actually understand that diversity makes a team stronger, that women are also good managers, and that applicants 50+ bring valuable experience to a company, then the pigeonhole thinking comes into their own The End. More “You mustn’t do that!”, However, narrows it down further and, in my opinion, increases the risk of misconduct

Instead of narrowing it down, more freedom, especially when it comes to thinking, would do well when it comes to anti-discrimination and equal treatment. Because it is about recognizing and adopting a personal self-image of the equality of different people. Anonymous application is a tried and tested means to an end. But it is unlikely to change people’s attitudes and thinking. And at the latest in the interview, the veil is lifted and Murat continues to lose to Michael.